why wouldn't the shark eat the lawyer

Lawyer humor

Most lawyers have heard most lawyer jokes. Some are even funny. I polled the office, and these were the “dad humor” lawyer jokes we liked best:

Why lawyers are truly on your side

Shakespeare was known for the quote, “The first thing we do/ Let’s Kill all the Lawyers” in the play Henry VI. What most people don’t know is that the remark was a defense of lawyers. The character in the play said it to point out that civilized societies need lawyers and that if you kill them, then there will just be anarchy.

About the Author: Drew Cochran

Drew Cochran has practiced criminal defense law in Annapolis for more than 20 years. He is a member of the Maryland State Bar, Anne Arundel County Bar, and the Maryland Criminal Defense Attorneys’ Association.

What is a lawyer joke?

Lawyer joke. Lawyer jokes, which pre-date Shakespeare 's era, are commonly told by those outside the profession as an expression of contempt, scorn and derision. They serve as a form of social commentary or satire reflecting the cultural perception of lawyers .

Who is the patron saint of lawyers?

Lawyers giving a talk, especially to the profession, often employ jokes as icebreakers. St. Ives is the patron saint of lawyers. In some jokes, he is the only lawyer in heaven, and can't be made to leave, since there is no other lawyer in heaven.

What did Satan offer to an attorney?

An attorney was working late one night in his office when, suddenly, Satan appeared before him. The Devil made him an offer. “I will make it so you win every case that you try for the rest of your life. Your clients will worship you, your colleagues will be in awe, and you will make enormous amounts of money. But, in return, you must give me your soul, your wife’s soul, the souls of your children, your parents, grandparents, and those of all the your friends.” The lawyer thought about it for a moment, then asked, “But what’s the catch?”

What is the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A bad lawyer might let a case drag on for several years. A good lawyer knows how to make it last even longer.