what to take to the lawyer when getting divorced

by Margarete Blanda 9 min read

Find the common information your divorce attorney will need below. 1. Your basic information: full name, date of birth, and social security number. 2. Contact information such as an address, landline/cell phone number, and email address. 3. Proof of state residency.

10 things to bring to your initial consultation with a divorce lawyer
  • Prepare your Schedule of Assets and Debts. ...
  • Prepare your Income and Expense Declaration. ...
  • Prepare a list of questions you want to ask the divorce lawyer. ...
  • Tax Returns. ...
  • Self-employment documents. ...
  • List out the relevant facts about your case.
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Feb 5, 2017

Full Answer

What to look for in a divorce lawyer?

If your divorce is likely to be messy or deals with specific types of assets, be sure your attorney is qualified to handle your particular case. For more information, see What to Look for in a Divorce Lawyer. Divorce cases depend heavily on documentation.

What do I need to do to prepare for a divorce?

Your financial account records, phone records, mortgages, and car notes are all likely relevant to the divorce. To the extent possible, gather all the documents you’ll need for your case before filing for divorce. If you and your spouse have a shared file of paper records in your home, make copies of everything before meeting with your attorney.

Do I need a lawyer to get a divorce?

If your divorce is contested then there's really no way to expect a good outcome without hiring an attorney. If, however, your divorce is uncontested, then you may be able to perform several parts of it on your own (or pro se which is a Latin term that means "for yourself").

What to do if your spouse is served with divorce papers?

If you and your spouse have a shared file of paper records in your home, make copies of everything before meeting with your attorney. It’s also smart to obtain records of your shared online accounts. Not all spouses react well to being served with divorce papers, and some will make it difficult to access documents after you’ve filed.

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What should a wife ask for in a divorce settlement?

5 Things To Make Sure Are Included In Your Divorce SettlementA detailed parenting-time schedule—including holidays! ... Specifics about support. ... Life insurance. ... Retirement accounts and how they will be divided. ... A plan for the sale of the house.

How should a woman prepare for a divorce?

9 Critical Steps Women Should Take To Prepare For DivorceGather your financial records. ... Open a Post Office Box. ... Start putting money away for legal and other professional fees. ... Open a new checking and savings account. ... Open new credit cards in your name only. ... Get a copy of your credit report.

Who suffers the most in a divorce?

menWhile there's no argument that everyone endures the pain of divorce in one way or another, many people may be surprised to hear that, according to research, men have a much more difficult time with a split than women.

How do I protect myself financially in a divorce?

How to Financially Protect Yourself in a DivorceLegally establish the separation/divorce.Get a copy of your credit report and monitor activity.Separate debt to financially protect your assets.Move half of joint bank balances to a separate account.Comb through your assets.Conduct a cash flow analysis.More items...•

How to deal with divorce emotionally?

If you have the financial means, it can help to speak with a therapist or other mental health professional. At the very least, speak with friends who have been through divorce. Let your family and friends know that you’ll be leaning on them for advice and moral support. Being emotionally stable will better prepare you to make smart decisions as your divorce progresses.

What does a divorce decree mean?

In most jurisdictions, the judge automatically issues an order at the beginning of your divorce case that prohibits you or your spouse from selling, buying, or otherwise encumbering or disposing of any marital property. Courts do this to prevent either spouse from draining the bank accounts, or dissipating the marital estate out of spite.

What should be included in a marital estate?

Include real property, cars, retirement accounts, bank accounts and other assets, as well as any mortgages, notes, credit cards, and other debts. This can give you an idea of what you and your spouse will split, and you can start working on your desired division of the marital estate.

Can I have a relationship with my spouse before divorce?

Additionally, a judge may consider money you spend on a paramour dissipation of the marital estate, and could require you to reimburse your spouse for those expenditures. In any case , it typically doesn’t help your case to have started another relationship before your divorce has been filed. In some states you can begin a relationship after filing for divorce; speak with your attorney about how the court will view dating before your divorce is complete. See Divorce and Dating for more information.

Can I get a divorce without a balance sheet?

You can’t decide your financial goals for your divorce without having an accurate picture of your assets and debts. While it’s not usually necessary to hire an accountant prior to filing for divorce, it’s a good idea to put together a simple balance sheet showing all of your assets and debts.

Can I get divorced if only one spouse wants to end the marriage?

Once you’ve served your spouse with divorce papers, it can be difficult to go back on that decision, even if you’ve changed your mind. The court can grant a divorce even if only one spouse wants to end the marriage. If you’d still like to give marital counseling a try, do so before you file for divorce.

Should I interview more than one attorney before filing for divorce?

It’s a good idea to interview more than one attorney before you decide to file for divorce. You’ll want to work with an attorney that fits your style, and understands your goals for litigation . Avoid lawyers who offer you solutions before listening to the particular facts of your case.

What to do after divorce is finalized?

An Attorney Can Help. Even though your divorce is finalized, it may take a while for you to adjust to your new life. After reading through this article, you'll likely want more information about what to do after your divorce is finalized, and you also may need to adjust alimony, child support, or custody. Your best option is to speak ...

What to do after a judgment is entered?

Even after the judgment is entered, there are certain steps that you must take to tie up loose ends and make sure that the financial and legal aspects of your life reflect your newly single status. And if you have children, you and your ex-spouse will still need to cooperate for their benefit.

What is the goal of hiring an attorney?

For many women, the ‘goal’ of hiring an attorney may simply be “get me outta this marriage!” But honing in on what you want your life to look like after the divorce dust has settled can be a useful tool for identifying how you want to work through the process of ending your marriage.

How long did it take Elizabeth to get divorced?

Having this goal in mind helped keep things moving, and as a result, her divorce took 364 days between her initial filing and final judgment.

How to get money from a prenup consultation?

If you want to get your money’s worth from a consultation, make sure you bring all of the documents associated with your prenup. The same goes if you and your spouse have started working out a separation agreement (or other agreement related to your pending split) in writing.

What should be on a second credit list?

On a second list you should put all of your credit accounts (including, but not limited to credit cards, student debt, personal loans, mortgage, car loan, etc.). That list should include the name of the debtor (s), the current balance on the debt, and the monthly payment.

Is it a good idea to talk to a lawyer about divorce?

If you’ve made up your mind and there’s no alternative but divorce, talking to at least a few lawyers is always a good idea. The first consultation is usually always free, so you’ve got nothing to lose. But, you can gain a lot of information during attorney interviews if you head into the conversation armed with the right questions.

Can you represent yourself in divorce?

Most states allow individuals to represent themselves in the divorce process. And, it’s more common than you think: 80 percent of divorces involve at least one party representing themselves. Lots of people go this route – which means you can, too.

Personal Information

1. Your basic information: full name, date of birth, and social security number.

Financial Information

29. A list of all joint and separate bank accounts, savings accounts, C.D.’s, Credit Union accounts, Savings Bonds and Stocks and Mutual Funds.

How to deal with a divorced spouse?

Take responsibility and actively participate in your divorce negotiations; Treat divorce negotiations with your spouse like a business transaction; Get emotional support and learn how to lower your emotional reactivity; Focus on your children and don't badmouth your spouse in front of your kids; Stay in your integrity;

What are the options for divorce?

While many people think litigation is the only option in divorce proceedings, there are many process options that can be tailored to your family's needs. Mediation, collaborative law, and outside of court attorney negotiation are all more flexible options than court.

What is a divorce support system?

Whether you are in the beginning stages of a divorce or somewhere in the middle, reaching out to and surrounding yourself with a professional and personal “divorce support system” aids in the logistical, legal, and emotional decisions of a divorce.

How to get out of divorce?

5. Stay in your integrity. No matter how angry or betrayed you might feel or no matter how much your spouse may be pressing your buttons, do not let him/her get the best of you and take you out of your integrity. Stay off social media and resist venting details of your divorce to anyone who will listen.

What does it mean when you put all the blame on your spouse?

When you assign all the blame to the other person, you are making yourself a victim. Having a victim mentality gives you a sense of powerlessness.

How to choose peace over war when getting divorced?

Here are a few tips to help you choose peace over war when getting divorced: 1. Choose a process, don't let the process choose you.

Why was it important to compromise in divorce?

"We were fortunate that by the time we started our divorce process, it was still important to compromise in order to have the least negative effect on the kids and to hurt each other as little as possible.

What is a divorce attorney?

A divorce attorney is someone who will be on your side and be able to think through legal decisions rationally, Dr. Hafeez explains. A divorce attorney can also advise you against taking certain actions that you might make in haste, anger, and emotion that could harm you down the road from a legal standpoint.

Do you lose friends when you get divorced?

When people get divorced friends are bound to take signs, Dr. Hafeez explains. The sad reality is that you will likely lose some friends, as will your spouse. This is just one of the reasons why it’s essential to find a support group of other soon-to-be or newly divorced people.

Is divorce difficult?

Divorce is difficult, and it is helpful to have people you can lean on for strength and support. Find a support group or friends who are going through a divorce; they’ll have a better understanding of what you are going through than someone who has never been down the same road, Quick says.

How to choose a divorce attorney?

There are several things to look for when choosing a divorce attorney. You want to choose someone who is experienced, respected, competent, and affordable. If they are proving to not be a good fit though, change them. Because you can, even if the reason is that you don't get on with him or her. Bear in mind however that if an attorney has worked on your case, you'll have to pay her/him for their time. Also, it might damage your case to change attorney's when you are close to a court ordered deadline, so only do it after careful consideration.

What are some secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you?

Below are twenty secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you. 1. It's going to cost more than you bargained for. It's not always the case—but more often than not, the costs associated with your divorce will often be higher than your lawyer's original estimate.

How do divorce lawyers save money?

That you'll save money and heartache by being organized. Divorce lawyers often charge by the hour. If you take responsibility for being as organized as possible, not only are you likely to walk away from your marriage with a more acceptable outcome, you'll probably save some money too.

What is mediation in divorce?

Mediation is a process whereby you and your spouse sit down with a neutral third party to negotiate several important areas of divorce. It's a low-cost way to address practically any other disagreement you and your spouse may have. While the mediator's decision is not binding, it allows a neutral party to provide their perspective on how divorce related issues should be addressed. However, mediation can only be a useful tool if you and your spouse can come to an broad agreement.

What does it mean to be uncontested in divorce?

An uncontested divorce means that you and your spouse agree child custody, spousal support, child support, visitation, and division of property. If you find that there is no need to fight over these things, you've already saved yourself thousands of dollars.

What is fault based divorce?

Fault-based divorce is when one spouse committed an act that gives legal justification to the ending of the marriage. These acts include adultery, a felony conviction, cruelty, or desertion.

How to start a divorce?

One of the best and simplest ways to do that is to start a divorce file. In this file, keep every bit of paper that could have an effect on how your divorce proceedings. Gather copies of all important financial documents and access to all account information. Keep it organized and easy to navigate.

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