saying: "what 2 things are attached to every bullet", "a lawyer and a fine?

by Dominique Friesen 8 min read

What happened to the doctor and lawyer in the car?

A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road. The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask. The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.

What does the tiger say to stop it?

The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says, “I said stop it!”. The rear tiger says, “Sorry,” and they continue.

Is it illegal to disguise yourself as a hunter?

It shall be illegal for a hunter to disguise himself as a reporter, drug dealer, pimp, female legal clerk, sheep, accident victim, bookie, or tax accountant for the purpose of hunting attorneys. #155. A young lady goes to see a lawyer regarding a minor matter.

The Best Lawyer Quotes

This article contains the best lawyer quotes: funny, inspirational, and famous quotes about lawyers and their careers. It also includes thank-you quotes for lawyers for those who have benefited from their services and wish to find the right words to show appreciation.

Quotes About Lawyers by Famous People

"If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.” —Charles Dickens

Thank-You Quotes for Lawyers

"Thank you for representing me. My situation would be much worse without your research, diligence, and hard work."

How to get a good lawyer to take your case?

“If you want to improve your chances of securing the best lawyer to take your case, you need to prepare before you meet them,” advises attorney Stephen Babcock. “Get your story, facts, and proof together well before your first meeting.” This not only ensures that you understand your own needs, but it helps a good lawyer to ascertain whether he or she can actually help you. “We want the best clients too. Proving you’re organized and reliable helps us.”

Why is it important to approach a lawyer with honesty?

“ Winning cases can be lost because of a client who lies or exaggerates just as easily as because of a lawyer who tells the client what the client wants to hear instead of what is true.” So when dealing with attorneys, don’t just look for honesty—be honest.

Do you need a lawyer to write a demand letter?

On reading a demand letter, the other person will often say, “this isn’t worth the trouble” and they quickly settle. But here’s a secret from Knight: You don’t need a lawyer to write a demand letter. You can do it yourself. Just make it look as formal as possible, and you may find your dispute goes away—no charge to you.

Can you appeal a disability denial?

If you feel helpless when faced with an insurance denial, please know that you might be able to appeal with the help of a qualified lawyer, says David Himelfarb, attorney. Insurance companies routinely deny long-term disability claims, for example, particularly because it’s assumed that most people don’t have access to reputable attorneys to challenge the denial. “This is where intricate knowledge of the legal and insurance process, as well as the right team of experts to prove the claim, can reverse the odds.”

Should a lawyer stay out of court?

In fact, a lawyer should try to stay out of court. “In my experience, a good lawyer always finds every opportunity to keep a case from being decided by a judge, and only relents on trying a case before the bench when all alternatives have been exhausted,” attorney, Jason Cruz says.

What is the most important weapon in a lawyer's arsenal?

One of the most important weapons in a lawyer’s arsenal is “argument”. The word “argument” engenders visions of debate, the heat and fury of positions attacked and defended strongly, though with words.

Who said a judge is like an ill tuned cymbal?

Even though quite a long time back Francis Bacon, then Lord Chancellor, commented about garrulous Judges that a much-talking Judge is like an ill-tuned cymbal, in real life they are the norm.

How were these things formulated?

How these things were formulated has many answers, but the most commonly accepted one is that these hark back to the courtly culture of a High Court of the King, where unless the King was pleased to suffer you speak, you had to keep quiet. What you say must please him. A bit like “Her Majesty’s Loyal Opposition”.

What are the elements of a defamation lawsuit?

Generally, in order to win your lawsuit, you must show that: Someone made a statement; The statement was published; The statement caused you injury;

Why is a witness immune to a lawsuit for defamation?

For example, when a witness testifies at trial and makes a statement that is both false and injurious, the witness will be immune to a lawsuit for defamation because the act of testifying at trial is privileged.

What is defamation of character?

The term "defamation" is an all-encompassing term that covers any statement that hurts someone's reputation, also called defamation of character. If the statement is made in writing and published, the defamation is called " libel ." If the hurtful statement is spoken, the statement is " slander ." Defamation is considered to be a civil wrong or a tort. A person that has suffered a defamatory statement may sue the person that made the statement under defamation law, which would be called a defamation case.

What is the meaning of "injury" in a defamation lawsuit?

This means that the statement must have hurt the reputation of the subject of the statement. For example, a statement has caused injury if the subject of the statement lost work as a result of the statement.

What to do if you are accused of defamation?

If you have been accused of defamation, or someone has defamed you, you'll want to know more about the law and your rights. A lawyer can help examine the specifics of your situation and the law in your jurisdiction to determine the strength of your claim.

Is it legal to make a defamatory statement on social media?

Social Media and Defamation Law. Due to social media, it's now easier than ever to make a defamatory statement. That's because social media services like Twitter and Facebook allow you to instantly "publish" a statement that can reach millions of people. Whether it's a disparaging blog post, Facebook status update, or YouTube video, ...

Is slander considered a libel?

These terms and details are further defined below: The Statement - A "statement" needs to be spoken (slander), written (libel), or otherwise expressed in some manner. Because the spoken word often fades more quickly from memory, slander is often considered less harmful than libel.

Farther or Further?

Farther refers to physical distance. (Remember that far suggests distance.)

His or Her? Avoid the Gender Minefield by Using Plurals

It’s hard isn’t it? As lawyers, we don’t always know the gender of the person we are writing about or we are writing about abstract issues that could apply to anyone—male or female. His sounds sexist and it is inaccurate where you don’t know the gender. Her sounds a little too political.

Subliminal Fear of Subparagraphs

Many of us harbor deep, subliminal fears about writing in subparagraphs. We wonder when we should use subparagraphs instead of prose or bullets. We forget how to punctuate the little buggers. And we sweat about grammar—particularly “parallel construction.” Let’s address each fear.

Setting Off Phrases Within a Sentence (Commas, Dashes, Parentheses)

There are three ways to set off phrases or any material that interrupts a sentence: