in a custody case what should you do to prepare if you dont have a lawyer

by Dr. Alexandre Hoeger 8 min read

If you're beginning a custody suit and acting without an attorney, it's a good idea to include copies of any documentation you gathered to support your arguments when you made your written submission. The judge will review these documents before you get to court.

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What should I do to prepare for my child custody case?

Sep 12, 2018 · If you have been unable to reach an agreement and have no choice but to have a custody trial, there are some things you can do to prepare for it and help your attorney (if you have one) present a good case. You must learn to document everything. Keep a journal and write down each incident that occurs with the other parent in terms of your child, such as missed …

How do I start a custody case without an attorney?

May 19, 2020 · Finally, parents who hope to win custody should prepare to make a positive first impression. Proper courtroom attire should never be overlooked. You only get one chance to make a good first impression on the judge. Before they hear your case or even know your child's name, they will form an opinion of you based on your appearance.

How can a father’s lawyer help me in my child custody case?

It's helpful to collect your thoughts before you head out to your first initial consultation with a child custody attorney. Write them down on paper and bring them with you. You don't want to forget to ask something. Also bring some writing material so that you can jot down the answers. Here are some good topics to focus your discussion:

How not to behave during a child custody battle?

Jul 01, 2021 · If you're beginning a custody suit and acting without an attorney, it's a good idea to include copies of any documentation you gathered to support your arguments when you made your written submission. The judge will review these documents before you get to court.

Why is a thorough investigation necessary?

If you’ve seen any legal proceeding, you know a thorough investigation is vital to uncover the relevant facts. An investigation takes time, and there are many things to consider in a child custody case. Every lead should be developed before you go to court. Most of us aren’t trained detectives.

What is the court system?

Court System. The court system is a complicated maze of documents, hearings, judges and other details you must handle with precision and timeliness. Paperwork must be completed correctly and filed on time and to the right place. Hearings are scheduled and mandatory. They’re difficult to reschedule.

Is divorce expensive?

Divorce and splitting up a home can be very expensive. When you add the cost of a child custody battle, you look for somewhere, often anywhere, to cut your expenses. And since no one knows your child better than you do, you should represent yourself in court. Right?

What is a familiar process?

Familiar Process. Your lawyer will be familiar with the other parties involved. They may be aware of recent rulings or decisions by the assigned judge and use that to formulate the best strategy. They may have faced the opposing attorney and know what tactics to expect.

Does legal representation cost money?

Of course, legal representation costs money. But it could cost you more if you represent yourself. If you lose your case, the opposing side could ask the court to make you pay their legal fees. If the judge rules in their favor, you would still owe a large amount.

What is the goal of a child custody case?

Your goal is anything that helps you build a winning child custody case. Another point to consider is how you respond to pressure. The court requires all who appear to remain calm and behave reasonably. Custody battles are very emotional. If you lose your temper quickly or overreact, you shouldn’t represent yourself.

What is the best way to fight for custody of a child?

Emotional Focus. Any parent who fights for custody of their child is extremely invested in the outcome. You work to protect your child and to prove you’re the best choice to be the custodial parent. But your emotional commitment could cause you to lose focus if you represent yourself.

What do you need to know about child custody?

Child custody laws vary from state to state, 1  so one of the first things you need to do is become familiar with the laws in the state where your custody hearing will be held. Reading the fine print can be tedious, but it will help you to find out for yourself what you're up against before attending the hearing.

How to win custody of a child?

Parents who hope to win child custody must behave appropriately in court or risk losing custody. 2  Discuss proper courtroom etiquette with your lawyer to get a better understanding of what's expected, as well as any pitfalls—like emotional outbursts or accusatory statements—you need to avoid or be on the lookout for. If possible, do some roleplaying with your lawyer in advance.

Who is Emily Swaim?

Emily is a fact checker, editor, and writer who has expertise in psychology, health and lifestyle content. Learn about our editorial process. Emily Swaim. on May 19, 2020. Going to your first child-custody hearing can be scary, especially for parents who are unfamiliar with the process. However, with just a little advanced planning, ...

Does Verywell Family use peer reviewed sources?

Verywell Family uses only high-quality sources , including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy. Children's Bureau. Determining the Best Interests of the Child.

What is the better parent standard?

The better-parent standard comes into play when a parent requests sole custody. Essentially, the judge has to be convinced that one parent is better than the other, which can be difficult to prove. 1 

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Gathering Documents to Show to a Child Custody Attorney

The child custody attorneys will find it helpful if you bring several documents with you, such as:

Questions to Ask

It's helpful to collect your thoughts before you head out to your first initial consultation with a child custody attorney. Write them down on paper and bring them with you. You don't want to forget to ask something. Also bring some writing material so that you can jot down the answers.

Your Ideal Child Custody Lawyer

It is a worthwhile practice to consider what qualities your ideal child custody lawyer would have. That way, you'll recognize the right one when you meet. Here are some qualities to consider:

What is a non-custodial parent?

A non-custodial parent who's trying to get custody can utilize this information in court to prove a continuous and meaningful relationship with the child. A custodial parent might use a log of visitation schedules to prove the lack of a continuous relationship between the child and the child's other parent.

Who is Rich Scherr?

Rich Scherr is a seasoned journalist who has covered technology, finance, sports, and lifestyle. It's difficult to determine which documents are important to bring to a child custody hearing. If you're confused about what to take with you, too much documentation is always better than too little.

What to include when your child is injured?

Your Child's Records. Consider including your child's report cards and other written documentation from others showing how well they have done while in your care—or vice versa. If your child is repeatedly injured while in their other parent's care, including doctor reports and emergency treatment records.

What is a custody evaluation?

A judge might order a custody evaluation in a truly contentious dispute to get to the bottom of things. A trained professional will meet with your child, usually repeatedly, and may visit both parents' homes, as well. It's the professional's job to report back to the court with a custody recommendation. 1

What to do if you are late to court?

If you’re late, don’t show up, or don’t let your ex know where/when/for how long your taking the kids then there’s going to be an issue.

How to win custody battle?

How to Fight and Win a Custody Battle. The first and most important thing to do if you’re going through a child custody battle with your ex is knowing why you’re fighting for custody in the first place. There are a lot of people out there who want , or need, to win their child custody cases, but don’t know exactly what they’re fighting for.

Is court case stressful?

Court cases are very stressful to children (even though they have no idea what’s going on) and too much stress can lead to many child hood issues like depression, anxiety or even delinquency later in life. Myth #2: The best parent is the one with custody. Again, not always true.

What happens if a non-custodial parent doesn't pay child support?

Myth #7: If the non-custodial parent doesn’t pay child support, the custodial parent loses their custody rights. This isn’t true, as it is entirely up to the court to decide how much the non-custodial parent must pay in order for them to have equal custody rights (or any at all).

Why should I hire an attorney?

On the other side, an attorney can serve as a capable liaison between you and your ex-spouse, diffusing personal attacks each side may launch against each other, possibly torpedoing a potentially favorable ruling.

Who is Fred Campos?

Fred Campos, aka @FullCustodyDad was custodial full custody parent of his then 4-year-old daughter, Caitlyn. Today she is an adult in college. Fred has re-married with two more boys, runs a web design company and currently serves on the HEBISD local school board.

Do I need a lawyer for child custody?

A lawyer is not required for child custody cases, making it easy to eschew hiring legal representation if you are facing a child custody case. Lawyers can gum up the works, increase hostility between two parents and maybe even drive a permanent wedge between them. And of course, their fees are not usually cheap.

What is the impact of child custody?

A child custody case can seem like a maze of legal paperwork, court dates, and visitation schedules; missing even a single detail in any of these areas can have a negative impact. Simply put, your relationship with your child is too important to risk letting that happen in a child custody case.Instead, you should look for an experienced family law ...

Is divorce hard to handle?

Posted by Matthew Myers on June 15, 2016. When you’re going through a divorce, it can be hard to handle the stress and emotional turmoil. Often, the legal aspects of divorce tend to get tangled up with the emotional and personal issues that led to the end of the relationship, and arguments over child custody only complicate the situation further.

What can an attorney do for a child?

An attorney can also use their experience to present your case before the judge in a clear and compelling fashion and communicate with the other side so that personal emotions don’t get in the way of what’s best for your child.

Why is divorce so hard for kids?

Divorce is a difficult time for children. It is hard for them to grasp the idea that their parents’ love for each other can simply end. Things are even more difficult when it becomes clear that the love transferred to a person that is not the child’s mother.

What happens during difficult times?

These difficult times often cause a person to act or react irrationally and in ways that detrimentally affect his or her case. You should be aware prior to court proceedings that the court will evaluate your behavior in its entirety throughout the proceedings and always behave accordingly.

How to determine how not to behave during custody battle?

To determine how not to behave during your custody battle, it is helpful to review the criteria used by the judge (“court”) to determine appropriate placement of the children. The court is charged with the responsibility of evaluating the situation to determine what placement and parenting time is in the child’s best interest.

Do children thrive in a two parent household?

Children thrive best in a two-parent household whenever possible. If a parent makes it a habit to put down the other parent, the children feel torn and forced to choose one parent over the other.

What to expect from your mother during custody battle?

In particular, expect your children’s mother to point out all negative behavior during your custody battle. If you behave as though the judge were standing next to you each time you interact with the children or their mother, you will certainly avoid the pitfalls that will reduce your custody chances.

Is it a crime to make physical contact with another person?

Making physical contact with another person in a harmful or offensive manner is a crime. Some states call that crime “battery” others refer to it as “assault.” Whatever the term, it is criminal.

What does it mean when you yell at your wife?

When you yell at your wife or your children it often gives the appearance that you are being abusive or bullying them.

How to prepare for mediation?

You don’t have to be best friends with the mediator, but neither do you want to be on the mediator’s bad side. DO ask your attorney to help you prepare for mediation .

What is mediation in California?

In some counties, mediation is simply a forum in which a neutral third party helps the parents to work out an agreement.