how to tell when i have the wrong divorce lawyer

by Curt Gutmann 5 min read

Indifferent or Dismissive If your attorney is dismissive of your thoughts and questions, you may have hired the wrong divorce lawyer. The stakes are high in a divorce, both financially and emotionally.

15 Signs Your Divorce Lawyer Is Doing a Bad Job
  • Missed Deadlines. ...
  • Perpetually Late. ...
  • Your Lawyer Doesn't Remember Case Details. ...
  • Your Lawyer Doesn't Know What's Going on in Your Case. ...
  • Unreturned Phone Calls. ...
  • Unfamiliarly with the Divorce Process. ...
  • Unfamiliar with Local Court Procedures. ...
  • Your Lawyer is Demeaning.
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Dec 22, 2015

Full Answer

What are the signs of a bad divorce lawyer?

Feb 09, 2021 · Indifferent or Dismissive. If your attorney is dismissive of your thoughts and questions, you may have hired the wrong divorce lawyer. The stakes are high in a divorce, both financially and emotionally. You want the lawyer you hire to zealously represent your interests.

Can my lawyer tell me what happened in my divorce case?

It’s the time to take care of yourself. In a nutshell, here are 8 sure-fire signs something's not right: You don't feel heard, understood or adequately represented. Your attorney doesn't return...

How do I find a good divorce attorney?

Here are six tips to help you avoid making the wrong choice when it comes to hiring an attorney to handle your divorce: Identify the potential need for a divorce attorney early. If you know a divorce is or may be on the horizon, it is worth your time to meet with a divorce attorney so that you are familiar with one that you like before you are ...

Do I need a lawyer for my divorce?

Dec 22, 2015 · Your attorney should know your case status at any given time. It’s okay if your attorney needs to check the docket or case notes to verify certain items. However, your lawyer should be able to tell you what’s happening in your divorce when you ask. 5. Unreturned Phone Calls. It's usually a bad sign if your attorney consistently fails to return your calls within a …

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How do I know if my lawyer is bad?

Signs of a Bad LawyerBad Communicators. Communication is normal to have questions about your case. ... Not Upfront and Honest About Billing. Your attorney needs to make money, and billing for their services is how they earn a living. ... Not Confident. ... Unprofessional. ... Not Empathetic or Compassionate to Your Needs. ... Disrespectful.Aug 19, 2020

What is the most common complaint against lawyers?

Perhaps the most common kinds of complaints against lawyers involve delay or neglect. This doesn't mean that occasionally you've had to wait for a phone call to be returned. It means there has been a pattern of the lawyer's failing to respond or to take action over a period of months.

What should you not say to a lawyer?

9 Taboo Sayings You Should Never Tell Your LawyerI forgot I had an appointment. ... I didn't bring the documents related to my case. ... I have already done some of the work for you. ... My case will be easy money for you. ... I have already spoken with 5 other lawyers. ... Other lawyers don't have my best interests at heart.More items...•Mar 17, 2021

How often should your lawyer update you?

Once a month is a good rule of thumb if things are slow, but if you are preparing for trial or in my case an administrative benefits hearing, the contact with you and your attorney should be more frequent and specifically scheduled.

What is unethical for a lawyer?

Attorney misconduct may include: conflict of interest, overbilling, refusing to represent a client for political or professional motives, false or misleading statements, knowingly accepting worthless lawsuits, hiding evidence, abandoning a client, failing to disclose all relevant facts, arguing a position while ...

How do you write a complaint letter about a lawyer?

Formal complaint against [name of lawyer or law firm] describe what the lawyer had been hired to do for you [for example dealing with the sale or purchase of a house] • say when this was [give the date or dates when the problem occurred]. My complaint is that [list what you think went wrong or wasn't done properly.

How often should I hear from my attorney?

You should never be afraid or feel like an intrusion to contact your attorney every three weeks or so, or more frequently if there is a lot going on with your health or other matters related to your legal case. There is of course a limit to how much you should be contacting or sharing.Jun 17, 2020

Why do lawyers ignore you?

There's bad news your attorney doesn't want to deliver. If your attorney is not experienced or efficient, they may have missed a deadline or made another mistake and aren't willing to confess their error. There could also be some bad news that is entirely outside of the attorney's control.Mar 29, 2021

Should you tell your attorney everything?

It is the kind of information that the client may wish to share with anyone – even their lawyer. The truth is this – a lawyer, any lawyer handling any important legal matter must have all of the facts and evidence in the case to do their job.Jun 13, 2021

Is it normal to not hear from your lawyer?

Throughout the process of getting your financial settlement after becoming injured, there may be periods of time that you do not hear from your attorney. Although this can be unnerving, it is a normal part of the legal process.Oct 25, 2018

Why do lawyers take so long to get back to you?

Once a case gets filed in court, things can really slow down. Common reasons why a case will take longer than one would hope can include: Trouble getting the defendant or respondent served. The case cannot proceed until the defendant on the case has been formally served with the court papers.May 28, 2020

What are 5 responsibilities of a lawyer?

Advise and represent clients in courts, before government agencies, and in private legal matters. Communicate with their clients, colleagues, judges, and others involved in the case. Conduct research and analysis of legal problems. Interpret laws, rulings, and regulations for individuals and businesses.Sep 8, 2021

What happens if your lawyer doesn't understand your law?

If your lawyer doesn’t understand local laws or procedures, your case may end up taking much longer than necessary, or even worse, being dismissed because your attorney failed to meet essential requirements.

What happens if you miss a court date?

Missing a court deadline could result in disastrous consequences for your divorce and may even amount to malpractice. 2. Perpetually Late. It’s a bad sign if your attorney is always running late, especially if it’s to an important meeting or a court hearing.

What is the difference between assertive and take charge divorce lawyers?

11. Too Detached. You don’t want a lawyer who becomes too emotional or weepy in court.

What does it mean when a lawyer doesn't respond to messages?

A lawyer who doesn't respond to numerous messages probably isn't giving your case the attention it deserves. 6. Unfamiliarly with the Divorce Process. Many attorneys focus on one or two practice areas, such as family law or criminal law.

What happens if your attorney forgets your 4th child?

Although you shouldn’t worry if your attorney forgets the name of your fourth child, there's a major problem if your lawyer doesn’t know anything about your case . Your attorney should remember the basics about your divorce.

Is it okay to ask your attorney to check your case notes?

It’s okay if your attorney needs to check the docket or case notes to verify certain items. However, your lawyer should be able to tell you what’s happening in your divorce when you ask. 5. Unreturned Phone Calls. It's usually a bad sign if your attorney consistently fails to return your calls within a reasonable time.

Can an attorney file documents on time?

There is simply no excuse for an attorney who can’t file documents on time or one who misses important hearings in your case. Missing a court deadline could result in disastrous consequences for your divorce and may even amount to malpractice.

What happens if your lawyer is lying?

Your lawyer’s actions can have a substantial negative impact on your case, especially if they cross the line into unethical or illegal behavior. You may want to win your case, but if your attorney is breaking the law or lying to help you do so, then you are both at risk of serious consequences.

What does it mean to find a lawyer?

Most of the time, finding a lawyer means there is a significant stressor in your life. Making important decisions like which attorney to use, while already under stress, can seem impossible. Hopefully, this guide will make the process somewhat less daunting.

What happens if an attorney is unprofessional?

Your lawyer’s actions can have a substantial negative impact on your case, especially if they cross the line into unethical or illegal behavior. You may want to win your case, but if your attorney is breaking the law or lying to help you do so, then you are both at risk of serious consequences. Unprofessional or unethical behavior can include: 1 Arriving late or failing to show up for important meetings, or missing court dates 2 Making decisions of importance about your case without discussing it with you first 3 Missing filing deadlines, filing paperwork incorrectly or filing the wrong paperwork with the court 4 Refusing to return your calls or messages within a reasonable timeframe 5 Knowing there is a conflict of interest in your case, but proceeding despite the ethical problem

What to do if your attorney is coming off like a used car salesman?

If your attorney is coming off like a used car salesman, be wary. You want an attorney who will fight for the best possible outcome, but the best of attorneys know they can never promise a positive outcome. You deserve an attorney who is honest with you, even if the truth hurts.

What to do if you are not receiving child support?

If you are battling for the custody of your children’s custody or struggling because you are not receiving child support, you need an attorney who will keep you apprised of every step of the process. If you continuously struggle to contact your lawyer, and they often do not return phone calls and messages , it is a bad sign.

What does it mean when an attorney starts at the bottom?

In the legal arena, attorneys start at the bottom and work their way up. If there is a lack of professional respect for your attorney, whether it is former clients, in the courtroom, or with their peers, it should be a red flag.

Can an attorney promise a specific result?

The legal system is made up of many moving parts, and though a good attorney can offer you a reasonable idea of what to expect, no one can promise a specific result.

How to choose a divorce attorney?

There are several things to look for when choosing a divorce attorney. You want to choose someone who is experienced, respected, competent, and affordable. If they are proving to not be a good fit though, change them. Because you can, even if the reason is that you don't get on with him or her. Bear in mind however that if an attorney has worked on your case, you'll have to pay her/him for their time. Also, it might damage your case to change attorney's when you are close to a court ordered deadline, so only do it after careful consideration.

What are some secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you?

Below are twenty secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you. 1. It's going to cost more than you bargained for. It's not always the case—but more often than not, the costs associated with your divorce will often be higher than your lawyer's original estimate.

How do divorce lawyers save money?

That you'll save money and heartache by being organized. Divorce lawyers often charge by the hour. If you take responsibility for being as organized as possible, not only are you likely to walk away from your marriage with a more acceptable outcome, you'll probably save some money too.

What is mediation in divorce?

Mediation is a process whereby you and your spouse sit down with a neutral third party to negotiate several important areas of divorce. It's a low-cost way to address practically any other disagreement you and your spouse may have. While the mediator's decision is not binding, it allows a neutral party to provide their perspective on how divorce related issues should be addressed. However, mediation can only be a useful tool if you and your spouse can come to an broad agreement.

What does it mean to be uncontested in divorce?

An uncontested divorce means that you and your spouse agree child custody, spousal support, child support, visitation, and division of property. If you find that there is no need to fight over these things, you've already saved yourself thousands of dollars.

What is fault based divorce?

Fault-based divorce is when one spouse committed an act that gives legal justification to the ending of the marriage. These acts include adultery, a felony conviction, cruelty, or desertion.

How to start a divorce?

One of the best and simplest ways to do that is to start a divorce file. In this file, keep every bit of paper that could have an effect on how your divorce proceedings. Gather copies of all important financial documents and access to all account information. Keep it organized and easy to navigate.

Questions you need to ask yourself before filing for divorce

Deciding to take a divorce is not an easy thing as many would think. There are a lot of factors to consider, a lot of evaluation of your own self. Making a haste decision could prove catastrophic. I will hereby outline some of the questions you must ask yourself before divorcing your spouse.

What is your motivation?

Too tired with your marriage? Take time explore your marriage. What exactly is your motivation behind the divorce? What is making you feel to give up on a lifetime journey that you already vowed before God, relatives and friends?

Are there other options apart from divorce?

I am sure divorce is not your only option. There are so many other option that you could put into consideration. Visiting a counselor, or separating for a while could help you make sound decision before things falls apart. This could help you to defuse the complex you might be having about your marriage. Try harder, you are born to win.

Could you be the problem?

The nature of a human being is to always see the other side of the story. Rarely will you find yourself guilty. We like to blame the other person more than we blame ourselves. Sit down and have a conference with yourself. See whether you have contributed to breaking your marriage.

Could you stay if your spouse changes?

Your marriage can still be saved if you fought for it. Giving up would portray weakness. Ask yourself, “What needs to be changed in my marriage so I feel good staying in marriage? Look if you can sit down with your spouse and talk it over. If it’s an issue that can be easily resolved, you might be able to work through it together.

What support do I have, and what support do I need?

The road to divorce may not be as easy as you think. It can be financially and emotionally tasking. You’ll need all the support you can get. Take inventory of what type of support you currently have and what type of support you will need in the future. Family, friends, and a good therapist can help you weather just about any storm.

Reasons why you should not think of a divorce

Many people will think of a divorce at least one moment in life especially when things fall apart. For some, divorce is a constant threat; for others, it feels like the only hope. Trying to make sense why you should always evade the thought of a divorce, let us look at some of the major reasons why divorce is wrong.

What happens when you go to court?

When you go to court, your lawyer will generally do most of the talking on your behalf. Unless the judge asks you a direct question, you probably won’t say much at all. However, your ex will be expected to speak for him- or herself.

Can my ex talk to my attorney?

Your ex cannot talk to your attorney for advice. Your lawyer and your ex can pass on information to each other, because your ex has no one to speak on his or her behalf, but that’s the legal extent of their communication with each other.

Is self representation necessary in divorce?

The Downside of Self-Representation During Divorce. While divorce seems like a straightforward process, that’s not always the case. In fact, there usually are back-and-forth documents that often need to be filed with the appropriate clerks within certain timeframes.

Can a friend give anecdotes about divorce?

Well-meaning friends and family might be able to provide personal anecdotes about their own child custody , property division and other divorce experiences, but every case has its own nuances; what works for one person won’t work for another, even if the situation is similar.

What are the rules of divorce?

Divorce is a civil action, and every state has rules of civil procedure. What you don’t hear about but, have probably fallen victim to, are the unwritten family court rules. These “unwritten rules,” are the rules that define how judges and lawyers conduct themselves with each other. These unwritten rules, the rules that define what goes on ...

What to do if you can't come to an agreement with your spouse?

If you find yourself unable to come to an agreement with your spouse and you do have to schedule a court date be wary of these hallway settlements. You hire a lawyer to protect your interests but you have to put pro-active energy into making sure those interests are truly protected. 3. Judges don’t enforce court orders.

What are the unwritten rules of family court?

3 Unwritten Family Court Rules: 1. Lawyers and judges cover for each other. Most judges and lawyers will not report each other for misconduct or violations of judicial ethics. Judges especially can get away with bad behavior because lawyers don’t want to get on a judge’s bad side. Lawyers know they will go before that judge again ...

Why are judicial orders not enforced?

Judges have the power to enforce awards but are typically reluctant to force men to honor their support obligations to their families because, under the law, men who don’t’ comply would have to be jailed, and judges are often highly reluctant to jail a deadbeat dad.”

What to do if you have a court date scheduled?

If you have a court date scheduled and wish to go before a judge for a decision, stand your ground. There is no guarantee you will get a better settlement from the judge but, you will at least know you were in control of how your divorce played out. 3.

Who said "Every woman there and the one man had been there time and time again"?

The quote is taken from Faith Eggers who was going to court for the first time to get an order for child support. “The stories I heard were awful. Every woman there, and the one man, had been there time and time again — all for child support. Every single one of them trying to collect child support from their exes.

Do judges and lawyers know each other?

Most judges and lawyers are friends outside the courtroom, especially if you live in a small community. Your lawyer knows the judge, his lawyer knows the judge and it is difficult for a judge to remain impartial if he is better buddies with one or the other of the lawyers.

How to prepare for divorce?

If you’re thinking about divorce, you need to immediately begin to set aside money for the all the expenses involved. Make copies of all your financial documents and legal records before your divorce proceedings begin.

What to do in a contentious divorce?

In more contentious divorces, an attorney can make sure that your interests are represented in court. Even in a “friendly” divorce you are often better off hiring a lawyer to help file paperwork and guide you through the court system. 2. Don’t neglect your finances.

What to do when a divorced couple has a large amount of assets?

Don’t forget to consult an attorney. A lawyer can make sure that you both review and understand anything before you sign or agree. An experienced family law attorney is often a good idea for situations where the divorcing couple has a large amount of assets, property or other complicated financial matters.

Is it normal to want to tell someone about divorce?

Emotions are running high, it’s perfectly normal to want to let others know what’s going on in your life. You may desperately want support, you may not want to suffer in silence, or you may just want to punish your partner and embarrass them. This doesn’t mean that you have to keep your a divorce secret from everyone, you just need to decide who you tell and why.

Do family and friends have good intentions when divorced?

Your family and friends may have good intentions, but their divorce experience is based on the facts and circumstances that are unique to them and may not apply in your situation.

Can you use your kids to manipulate your spouse?

This should go without saying, but unfortunately, it still happens, even unintentionally. Check your own behavior and don’t use your kids to punish or manipulate your spouse. In the end, this will cause resentment and have a negative impact on the relationship you have with your children.

Can you have a relationship outside of marriage during divorce?

Even if you and your spouse no longer live together, in some states a relationship outside of marriage can become an issue during the divorce process. With all of the changes going on in your life, avoiding any type of romantic relationship is often the best thing to do for your emotionally. 8.

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