how to talk to a lawyer about divorce

by Randal Mertz 9 min read

What To Ask A Divorce Lawyer On Your First Visit.

  • 1. Ask them to describe their approach to the divorce process.
  • 2. Ask about communication. How will they check in with you throughout the process?
  • 3. Ask how you’ll be able to monitor the status of your case.
  • 4. After you lay out your case, ask where they see things potentially going off track.
  • 5. Talk about payment.

Full Answer

Can I talk to my spouse about my divorce attorney?

However, speaking with your spouse about the divorce does not mean you speak with your spouse about what your attorney told you and/or what you told your attorney. 4. How can I keep communication between my spouse and me amicable? You should strive for amicable communication.

What are some secrets your divorce lawyer might not want you to know?

One of the secrets that your divorce lawyer might not want you to know is that divorce proceedings are not used punitively. Sometimes, parties want to stick it to their soon to be ex-spouse as recompense for something they did.

How do I go through a divorce without a lawyer?

The legal issues involved in a divorce are numerous and complex, which is why it can be daunting to go through a divorce without legal representation. Contact a local divorce attorney who can answer any questions and help guide you through the divorce process.

What questions should I ask my divorce lawyer?

After you’ve laid out the path that led you to pursue divorce and shared the outcome you’re hoping to achieve after your divorce is final, ask the lawyer where they’ve seen things going off the rails in similar cases they’ve worked on. What red flags did your story raise for them?

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What should a woman ask for in a divorce settlement?

You can ask for life insurance, a smaller share of your accumulated debt, more of the family heirlooms or jewelry, or a higher percentage of the retirement funds. Just like women, the men can ask for whatever they feel like they're entitled to within the divorce.

What questions should I ask when getting a divorce?

Questions to ask a divorce attorney on the first visit about communicationHow often will we communicate about my case? ... How will we communicate with each other? ... What communication should I have with my spouse about the issues you and I discuss? ... How can I keep communication between my spouse and me amicable?More items...

What is the average divorce settlement in the UK?

In the UK, divorce settlements typically aim to achieve a 50/50 split for both parties. However, this split is often not met due to other circumstances that arise, meaning that one party receives a larger portion of the matrimonial assets than the other.

What questions should I ask my lawyer?

Questions to Ask Your Lawyer During a Consultation1) What kind of experience do you have with similar cases?2) What would be your strategy for my case?3) Are there any alternatives to going to court?4) What are my possible outcomes?5) Who will actually handle my case?6) What is my role in my case?More items...•

How long does a divorce take?

A divorce or dissolution will take at least 6 months to complete, even if your circumstances are straightforward. It might take longer if you need to sort out issues with money, property or children.

What to do before getting a divorce?

17 Things To Consider Before Asking for a DivorceWhy Do I Want It? ... Do I Still Love My Partner? ... Am I Rational or Emotional? ... Am I Reasonable? ... Have I Made My Feelings Clear? ... Is There Anything My Partner Can Do to Change the Situation? ... Have I Tried Everything I could? ... Is This the State or a Stage?More items...

Is my wife entitled to half my savings?

If you decide to get a divorce from your spouse, you can claim up to half of their 401(k) savings. Similarly, your spouse can also get half of your 401(k) savings if you divorce. Usually, you can get half of your spouse's 401(k) assets regardless of the duration of your marriage.

What can wife claim in divorce?

For example, under the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955, both the husband and wife are legally entitled to claim permanent alimony and maintenance. However, if the couple marries under the Special Marriage Act, 1954, only the wife is entitled to claim permanent alimony and maintenance.

What is ex wife entitled to after divorce?

Generally, a former spouse is entitled to claim against your money or assets at any point up until they re-marry unless a financial consent order has been approved by the court. Many separating couples are under the impression that getting divorced breaks all financial ties.

What is the hardest question to ask a lawyer?

12 Tough Questions to Ask a LawyerWhat's your opinion of the probate process?Under what conditions do you recommend a Living Trust?How do I protect my children from abusive relatives if something happens to me?Can I keep my kids from controlling their entire inheritance at 18?More items...•

What you should know before you talk to a lawyer?

10 Things You Should Know Before Contacting a LawyerHave Your Documents Ready. ... Research the Elements of Your Case. ... Don't Call if You Just Have a Question. ... You May Not Speak to a Lawyer Right Away. ... Do Not Ask the Legal Support Staff for Advice. ... Don't Provide Too Much Information. ... Answer the Lawyer's Specific Questions.More items...•

What do you say when talking to a lawyer?

Tips for Talking to an AttorneyAlways be as honest and candid as possible about the facts of your case. ... Ask questions if you don't understand something that your attorney mentions or explains to you.Approach an attorney about your case as soon as you think you may need one.More items...•

Why is confidentiality important in divorce?

The confidentiality shared in the attorney-client relationship is important to your attorney’s ability to be your best advocate, and counselor in the divorce process. This is a “no judgment” zone. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing this kind of information with your divorce attorney, you may want to consider that this may not be ...

What happens when you discover your affair?

The day your affair was discovered will be one of those days you aren’t likely to ever forget. With the secret you worked hard to hide now out in the open, your two worlds have collided, and you are left to deal with the great emotional damage you caused to those you care about most.

1. Your must-haves and your goals

What can’t you live without? What do you want your life to look like post-divorce?

2. The true and unannotated version of events

State the facts clearly and plainly and without critical comments about your spouse or the important events in question.

What is the goal of hiring an attorney?

For many women, the ‘goal’ of hiring an attorney may simply be “get me outta this marriage!” But honing in on what you want your life to look like after the divorce dust has settled can be a useful tool for identifying how you want to work through the process of ending your marriage.

How long did it take Elizabeth to get divorced?

Having this goal in mind helped keep things moving, and as a result, her divorce took 364 days between her initial filing and final judgment.

Is it a good idea to talk to a lawyer about divorce?

If you’ve made up your mind and there’s no alternative but divorce, talking to at least a few lawyers is always a good idea. The first consultation is usually always free, so you’ve got nothing to lose. But, you can gain a lot of information during attorney interviews if you head into the conversation armed with the right questions.

Can you represent yourself in divorce?

Most states allow individuals to represent themselves in the divorce process. And, it’s more common than you think: 80 percent of divorces involve at least one party representing themselves. Lots of people go this route – which means you can, too.

What questions should I ask my divorce lawyer?

There are also some basic questions that a family law attorney will need to ask you to begin the divorce process, including the date of your marriage, information about your children (if any), an overview of your property and debts, and whether your case involves custody, child support, or alimony issues. An experienced divorce lawyer will know how ...

What to expect during a divorce consultation?

The subjects discussed during your consultation will depend on how far along you are in your divorce. Some clients are eager to file for divorce immediately, while others are still unsure if a divorce is right for them and just want some information about their legal rights.

Can an attorney meet with you privately?

An attorney will meet with you privately or may ask your permission to have an assistant sit in on the meeting. Anything you tell your attorney or the assistant will be kept private due to the "attorney-client privilege," and as a result, you don't have to worry about your spouse finding out what you discussed.

Should I leave a divorce consultation?

Ultimately, a good attorney will simpli fy your divorce, not complicate it.

Why is it important to ask a divorce attorney about their experience?

First, it will test the divorce attorney's knowledge and experience of the divorce process and divorce law. Second, it will educate you on what specifically the attorney can and will do with you to help mitigate the costs. Do not settle for a generic answer.

What can a divorce attorney do for you?

An experienced and knowledgeable divorce attorney will provide you with the tools to communicate better with your spouse. These tools include how to communicate with your spouse, when to communicate with your spouse and how to diffuse conflict.

What happens if an attorney cannot provide references to former clients?

If an attorney cannot provide you with multiple references to former clients, that attorney may not have much success representing clients. The former clients should also be types of cases similar to yours. I am not referring to you going through a divorce and getting a referral to a prior divorce client.

What is spousal support?

Spousal support, also called alimony, is either temporary or ordered at the final judgment. Most divorce cases include both temporary spousal support and spousal support at the judgment phase. We are not going to go into a lengthy discussion about spousal support.

What happens if an attorney does not have a solid command of the law?

If the attorney does not have a solid command of the law on these issues, he or she may lack the experience you need. This is especially true if you expect your divorce to be contested and high conflict. Questions to ask a divorce attorney on the first visit about the divorce process. 1.

What should an attorney explain to you?

The attorney should explain to you the importance of the attorney - client relationship and the privilege in communications. The attorney should explain to you how and why you should not disclose attorney - client communications to any third parties or your spouse. This is a complex topic.

How often do attorneys communicate?

The more complex the case, the more the communication will likely take place. A typical case has communication between one to four times per month.

What to discuss with a lawyer about divorce?

There are a number of important issues you will need to discuss with your attorney during the first meeting, including child custody, child support, spousal support, division of the marital estate, any separate property claims, community debts, and your expectations about the likely outcome of the case.

How to share facts with divorce lawyer?

It’s important to share all relevant facts with your divorce attorney so he or she can prepare for and deal with potential problems. Even if you think a particular fact is irrelevant to your divorce, make certain to mention it to your attorney so he or she can decide whether the item could create a problem down the road. You don’t need to tell your attorney everything about your marriage and children, but make certain to share all items relevant to the issues of your case. If you are in doubt about what your attorney needs to know, get guidance on what’s relevant.

What is collaborative divorce?

A collaborative divorce is a cooperative process where an experienced team guides you through your divorce with minimal stress and expense. Litigation is an adversarial approach to divorce and involves going to court, presenting evidence, ...

Why is it important to go to court for divorce?

Going to court encourages fighting, the stress of litigation makes it more likely you will become emotional, and the lawyers will control the divorce because court rules and procedures are complex.

How to reconcile a marriage?

Making a marriage work can be challenging, especially when one spouse is considering divorce. It takes time and effort to rebuilt a relationship, but if both spouses are committed to making the marriage work, reconciliation is possible. 1.

Why do lawyers use investigators?

Some attorney use investigators to search for damaging facts, and if there is a suspicion of an affair , an investigator is likely to be involved. If you are in an abusive relationship, make certain you tell your lawyer, even if you are ashamed of it. Also, if you have contracted a sexually transmitted disease or have hidden assets or debts, ...

What happens during discovery in a divorce?

During the discovery process, if you opt for a litigated divorce , these facts are likely to come up and in a collaborative divorce, you are obligated to share all relevant information with the other side. Some attorney use investigators to search for damaging facts, and if there is a suspicion of an affair, an investigator is likely to be involved. ...

What are some secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you?

Below are twenty secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you. 1. It's going to cost more than you bargained for. It's not always the case—but more often than not, the costs associated with your divorce will often be higher than your lawyer's original estimate.

How to choose a divorce attorney?

There are several things to look for when choosing a divorce attorney. You want to choose someone who is experienced, respected, competent, and affordable. If they are proving to not be a good fit though, change them. Because you can, even if the reason is that you don't get on with him or her. Bear in mind however that if an attorney has worked on your case, you'll have to pay her/him for their time. Also, it might damage your case to change attorney's when you are close to a court ordered deadline, so only do it after careful consideration.

How do divorce lawyers save money?

That you'll save money and heartache by being organized. Divorce lawyers often charge by the hour. If you take responsibility for being as organized as possible, not only are you likely to walk away from your marriage with a more acceptable outcome, you'll probably save some money too.

What is mediation in divorce?

Mediation is a process whereby you and your spouse sit down with a neutral third party to negotiate several important areas of divorce. It's a low-cost way to address practically any other disagreement you and your spouse may have. While the mediator's decision is not binding, it allows a neutral party to provide their perspective on how divorce related issues should be addressed. However, mediation can only be a useful tool if you and your spouse can come to an broad agreement.

What does it mean to be uncontested in divorce?

An uncontested divorce means that you and your spouse agree child custody, spousal support, child support, visitation, and division of property. If you find that there is no need to fight over these things, you've already saved yourself thousands of dollars.

What is fault based divorce?

Fault-based divorce is when one spouse committed an act that gives legal justification to the ending of the marriage. These acts include adultery, a felony conviction, cruelty, or desertion.

How to start a divorce?

One of the best and simplest ways to do that is to start a divorce file. In this file, keep every bit of paper that could have an effect on how your divorce proceedings. Gather copies of all important financial documents and access to all account information. Keep it organized and easy to navigate.

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