how to fight a custody battle without a lawyer

How to Win a Custody Battle Without a Lawyer

• Prepare for Your Case. Abide by current court orders while you prepare for your custody case, even if you disagree with them.
• Compile Information for Court. ...
• Follow Proper Procedure. ...
• Attend All Court Appointments. ...
• Plan Ahead for Hearings. ...
• Maintain a Level Head Throughout. ...

Full Answer

Do I need a lawyer to fight for child custody?

Jul 03, 2021 · What To Do to Win Your Child Custody Battle Here are some tips on winning your child custody battle. Tip #1: Show a willingness to work together with your EX. Remember that you’re going to be on this team with your child’s other parent and the court system wants you to work together and not apart. Tip #2: Don’t shrug off or be late to visitation

What to do if you’re going through a child custody battle?

Aug 25, 2009 · Posted March 21, 2007. I have a custody battle on my hands. I have to have my papers filed by the end of next week at the latest and I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. My ex (the baby's father) filed paperwork through the courts without a lawyer. We have to go to mediation where you do not need a lawyer. However, I am petrified.

Can’t walk away from a custody fight?

1. Alienation of affection. Children thrive best in a two-parent household whenever possible. If a parent makes it a habit to put down the other parent, the children feel torn and forced to choose one parent over the other.

What happens when parents fight over custody of their children?

May 15, 2020 · Option 1: Not Having Legal Representation From a Child Custody Attorney. You do not need to have an attorney for a custody dispute in most states. Representing yourself in court is your right and can have pros and cons. The obvious pro is that you will save money on legal fees. However, going to court generally means the parents cannot find a solution.

How do you survive a nasty custody battle?

We've put together a list of custody battle tips to help you in the process.Be Willing to Cooperate With Your Ex. ... Perception is Important. ... Do Your Homework. ... Try Not to Change Your Schedule. ... Keep Your Children Out of It. ... Try to Settle out of Court. ... Get a Custody Lawyer. ... Try These Custody Battle Tips.

How do you win a custody battle against a narcissist?

How Do You Win a Custody Case Against a Narcissist? Follow These 9 Steps#1 Remember That You Are Dealing With a Narcissist. ... #2 Take Note of Everything That Happens. ... #3 Stop or Limit Communication. ... #4 Contact Law Enforcement. ... #6 Ensure Your Physical Safety. ... #8 Continue Being Dependable. ... #9 Secure the Right Attorney. ... Stay Calm.More items...•Mar 16, 2021

How do you expose a narcissist in custody?

Getting a narcissist to reveal themselves in court may be as easy as allowing them to talk about what a great parent they are to their children. Let them talk about how they spend time with the children doing homework, taking them to practice, and riding bicycles.Apr 20, 2021

How do you prove a narcissist in court?

Key Takeaway About Beating a Narcissist in Family CourtDocument everything with facts, dates, and copies of any communications.If other people witnessed your spouse's behavior, tell your lawyer immediately.Remain calm during each court appearance or meeting involving your spouse.More items...•Mar 16, 2021

What is the advantage of having a lawyer handle custody cases?

The biggest advantage of having a lawyer handle your custody case is they’re trained in all the appropriate laws.

What is the goal of a child custody case?

Your goal is anything that helps you build a winning child custody case. Another point to consider is how you respond to pressure. The court requires all who appear to remain calm and behave reasonably. Custody battles are very emotional. If you lose your temper quickly or overreact, you shouldn’t represent yourself.

What is the court system?

Court System. The court system is a complicated maze of documents, hearings, judges and other details you must handle with precision and timeliness. Paperwork must be completed correctly and filed on time and to the right place. Hearings are scheduled and mandatory. They’re difficult to reschedule.

Is a hearing mandatory?

Hearings are scheduled and mandatory. They’re difficult to reschedule. And tardiness can damage your case. Someone also has to stand before the judge, present evidence and argue on your behalf. That can be very intimidating without experience.

Do you need witnesses to testify in court?

Witnesses. To make a winning case, you may need to have witnesses appear in court. Subpoenas may have to be issued. Such witnesses must be prepped for their court date. It takes someone experienced in custody battles to prepare witnesses to testify effectively.

What to consider when trying to win custody battle?

The other thing you need to take into consideration when trying to win your child custody battle is what your ex is going to do. It doesn’t matter how reasonable and level-headed you are, if they decide to fight dirty then you’re almost guaranteed to lose your case.

What to do when you have a child custody battle with your ex?

The first and most important thing to do if you’re going through a child custody battle with your ex is knowing why you’re fighting for custody in the first place. There are a lot of people out there who want, or need, to win their child custody cases, but don’t know exactly what they’re fighting for. If this sounds like you, you might want ...

What happens if a non-custodial parent doesn't pay child support?

Myth #7: If the non-custodial parent doesn’t pay child support, the custodial parent loses their custody rights. This isn’t true, as it is entirely up to the court to decide how much the non-custodial parent must pay in order for them to have equal custody rights (or any at all).

What is the myth of child custody?

The Myths of Child Custody: Myth #1: The best parent is the one who most wants the child. This isn’t always true, as there are times when it is better to have two parents that don’t want to be with each other, but rather than fight they work together for their children’s sake.

What to teach kids during custody battle?

There are a lot of things that can go wrong if you’re going through a custody battle, but there are plenty of ways to use this as an opportunity to teach your kids valuable life lessons. This, in turn, will teach them to treat their children with kindness and respect even when they’re going through a bad period.

What to do if you are late to court?

If you’re late, don’t show up, or don’t let your ex know where/when/for how long your taking the kids then there’s going to be an issue.

Which state has the worst child support laws?

The state you live in or move to could decide the custody battle for you, whether it’s good or bad. Pennsylvania has some of the most stable law regarding child support and custody battles and California (yes, it is true) has one of the worst laws in this regard. A child support case can take years to settle out there!

1. Do everything you can to settle out of court

Going all the way to trial in a custody battle is exhausting and expensive. Plus, you never know what a judge is going to do.

2. Consult with experts before you start a war

Don’t even think about waging a custody war on your own! This is not Court TV. The stakes are high and the fight is long and complicated. Do not try to do this on your own.

3. Dial down the drama

When parents fight, children suffer. I have seen well-adjusted, straight “A” students start flunking out and doing drugs after their parents started fighting over them in court.

4. Do your best to be objective

Is the custody that you are fighting for (whether that is joint custody or sole custody) really going to be best for your kids? Is there any way you can compromise without putting your children in the middle of a war?

5. If you are going to fight, do it for the right reasons

Protecting your kids from an abusive parent is a good reason to engage in a custody battle. Fighting about custody to gain leverage over your spouse in the money issues of your divorce is not.

6. Control Yourself

While you are going through a custody battle, you will be living your life under a microscope. Everything you do can potentially make a difference in your case.

7. Support your kids

No matter what is going on in court, you have an obligation to support your children. Period. Full stop.

avman

If you are not sure of the law and are fearful of the process I'd highly recommend you have an attorney. I know they are expensive, but we're talking about the future of your child here. Signing a document you don't understand, forgetting about a certain procedure, or not filing the right form can be disasterous and have huge repurcussions.

rocio

Here in Canada they have free legal aid available to people with a low income. I don't know if you have that in the U.S. or if you'd be eligible. But they are pretty flexible. I used them before and didn't quite meet their requirements (made too much money) but they bent the rules to help me out.

TheSmilingTurnip

Get over your pride and put your child first. Let your brother help you.

BeStrongBeHappy

I think that at a minimum you should accept enough money from your brother to have a quick emergency consultation with a lawyer before you have your initial hearing, just to learn your rights so you don't walk in to the mediation cold...

avman

Good for you. I'm glad you are getting some legal help with this. This is just too important to try to go through it alone.

jengh

oh god.... so much drama.... im so glad you hired a lawyer. This will make things so much less stressful...

fnlyfrei

Yes, custody battles are heart-wrenching. And even if YOU know that you are a good parent...a parents primal fear is of losing their child. The anxiety alone is enough to render someone into a boneless pile on the floor.

How to determine how not to behave during custody battle?

To determine how not to behave during your custody battle, it is helpful to review the criteria used by the judge (“court”) to determine appropriate placement of the children. The court is charged with the responsibility of evaluating the situation to determine what placement and parenting time is in the child’s best interest.

What to expect from your mother during custody battle?

In particular, expect your children’s mother to point out all negative behavior during your custody battle. If you behave as though the judge were standing next to you each time you interact with the children or their mother, you will certainly avoid the pitfalls that will reduce your custody chances.

What are the two forms of alienation of affection that get dads into trouble?

The two most common forms of alienation of affection that get dads into trouble are: criticizing mom around the kids and keeping the children from mom in any way.

What happens if you ignore an order of support?

If the court enters an order of support and you choose to ignore it, that is considered contempt of court. If the judge makes a finding that you are in contempt, you may be fined or even jailed for such behavior.

What does it mean when you yell at your wife?

When you yell at your wife or your children it often gives the appearance that you are being abusive or bullying them.

What happens when a mother keeps her child from her father?

On the other hand, when the mother keeps the child from the father, parental alienation can occur, and that has serious ramifications. 2. Yell at wife and/or children.

Why is divorce so hard for kids?

Divorce is a difficult time for children. It is hard for them to grasp the idea that their parents’ love for each other can simply end. Things are even more difficult when it becomes clear that the love transferred to a person that is not the child’s mother.

How to handle a custody dispute?

Even if the other parent isn't entirely willing to cooperate, you may have some options to save money while handling a child custody dispute: 1 Some law firms can advise you on a case by-the-hour, or act as your counsel outside of court. 2 You can save money by handling all paperwork and case prep yourself, but this is a large, time-consuming feat. 3 You can ask a lawyer to review your paperwork and help ensure it will meet the judge's expectations 4 You can have an attorney only for your court hearings. Just remember that the case will not be as strong if the attorney gets involved last minute, so involving them early is a good idea. 5 An attorney can work with your ex-partner to compromise on a parenting plan, which keeps the case out of court. 6 You can also use a lawyer to try to convince the other parent to use mediation if they refused before.

What is a custody battle?

While child support considers the money needed to raise a child, a custody hearing (sometimes called a child custody "battle") considers the visitation rights and parenting plan that most benefits your child. If you feel frustrated that a court can tell you what is best for your child, you are not alone. Many parents think a custody order (also ...

How much does an attorney cost?

Attorney are always a large expense that people do not plan for. Most cost $100-$500 per hour, and your case may need many hours. However, attorneys can cost less in the long run because they don't make mistakes in the process, and generally, the overall process goes faster.

How to save money on court case prep?

You can save money by handling all paperwork and case prep yourself, but this is a large, time-consuming feat. You can ask a lawyer to review your paperwork and help ensure it will meet the judge's expectations. You can have an attorney only for your court hearings.

What to do if your spouse treats you like you are inferior?

If your spouse treats you like you are inferior and will not listen to your viewpoint, you will want to consider hiring an attorney to protect your rights. You are involved in a domestic violence situation. There is no question that you need a lawyer if your safety, and your children's safety, is at risk.

Can both parents have custody of their children?

Both parents have the right to seek custody of their children — with or without an attorney. However, some factors make the case lean in favor of one side or the other. It is a good idea to have an attorney if: You have a history of drug or alcohol use.

Is it a right to represent yourself in court?

Representing yourself in court is your right and can have pros and cons. The obvious pro is that you will save money on legal fees. However, going to court generally means the parents cannot find a solution. So you are looking at a complex process in front of you before you even get to the courtroom.

How to file for custody without a lawyer?

You may face some setbacks along the way. Contact your local legal aid organization for support and referrals to resources. Be open to reassessing your decision to work without a lawyer.

What are the things that influence a child custody decision?

Some things that could influence a child custody decision include: Evidence of domestic violence, abuse, or neglect.

How to file for child custody pro se?

Filing for child custody pro se requires research and planning. Parents who head into court solo should be prepared to pay close attention to detail, maintain meticulous paperwork, and understand the laws related to their case. Consider your bandwidth as you evaluate whether going through this process without the assistance of a lawyer is right for you.

How to file pro se in a child's court?

Begin by contacting the family court clerk to obtain the proper paperwork. Typically, the court with which you must file will be located in the county where your child has lived for the past six months. 6 Be sure to inform the clerk that you are filing pro se so that you access the correct forms.

What is legal aid?

Legal aid organizations offer free legal advice and representation to low-income individuals. 3 They can be a great resource and may be able to give you further direction before going to court. If you decide to go ahead with representing yourself, give careful thought to all of your child custody options.

What documents are needed for a child custody case?

Documents you'll likely need include: 1 Proof of paternity or legal parentage 7 2 Child's birth certificate 3 Any existing orders related to the child

How long does it take for a parent to respond to a motion?

Before mediation or a hearing is scheduled, the court must wait for a response to your motion from the other party. Courts typically offer three to four weeks for the other parent to respond.

What is the best way to get help with child custody?

A knowledgeable and qualified child custody lawyer can help you make sense of the process. They will also inform you of your rights and represent you in court if needed. It is especially important to seek the assistance of an attorney for guidance on interstate child custody issues.

Who gets custody of a child when the parents are unmarried?

Who Gets Child Custody When the Parents are Unmarried? Divorce and separation cases can be complicated to begin with. But when children are involved, they can include settling disputes over custody (who is the main caretaker), visitation (how often and under what specific conditions will the non-custodial parent see the child), ...

What is the best course of action for a legal parent?

Legal parents have priority, and the best course of action is to adopt the child. Another issue is child support. The custodial parent has the right to receive financial support from the non-custodial parent, in order to properly care for the shared child. This applies even if the parents are unmarried.

What are the issues with parents who live together but are unmarried?

Parents who live together but are unmarried may face some unique issues, the biggest of which is establishing paternity. Some other issues include parental rights in places such as school and medical facilities, choosing a last name for the child, and claiming the child as dependent on your taxes.

Is it uncommon for one parent to have visitation rights?

It is very uncommon that one parent is not given visitation rights at all.

Can a father petition the court to establish paternity?

Should the mother dispute the paternity claim, the father can petition the family law court to establish his paternity.

Can a father see his child without a court order?

The father has no legal right to see their child without a court order . Legally, there is no presumption of paternity; this means that unwed fathers are not, by default, assumed to be biologically related to their children.

What to do if an amicable agreement can't be reached?

If the amicable agreement can’t be reached, it’s best to leave the mediation to the lawyers. I know this is wicked hard because your child is involved, so you’re bound to be emotional, defensive, anxious or in a “fight mode.”. Resist the urge to get into it with a narcissist!

Why does it backfire on you when you are in court?

It may be very clear to you what they are, but it’s not clear to the court. So it may backfire on you because it makes you look slanderous and judgmental.

How to deal with a narcissistic ex?

Keep calm and stay away. As a rule, try not to have any arguments (or even contact) with the narcissistic ex (or whoever you’re battling in court) prior to the custody hearing. Narcissists are very good at pulling you into conflict, and making you emotional. Because when you’re emotional, you’re likely to make a mistake.

Who can recognize a narcissist?

The lawyers, the judges, the police and other law officials are even less likely to recognize a narcissist (unless they’ve had experience with this before). So make sure you get the best representation possible. A lawyer versed in dealing with a narcissist will know how to expose them.