contacted a lawyer for a divorce now what

Do I need a lawyer for my divorce?

May 11, 2020 · I have been working with Rob Mar for 11 months now. Mr. Mar has been helping me with an extremely difficult divorce case. The difference with working with Rob, after being with another Law Firm and Attorney for the first 3 months of my case, is remarkable.This is my first experience with Family Law and my first divorce of a 36 year marriage ...

Why doesn’t my Ex have a divorce lawyer?

Your lawyer should locate a well-respected forensic accountant or business appraiser now for possible later use. Maybe custody will be an issue, and you'll need an expert to testify on your behalf. In some jurisdictions, the judge will appoint an expert to report to the court, but you still might need someone to support your case.

What are some secrets your divorce lawyer might not want you to know?

Jul 13, 2018 · Anytime you are unsure what to do regarding a family law issue, please call 757-383-9184 to reach The Firm For Men. We can help with separation, divorce, custody and more. Contact us online or stop by our office in Virginia Beach to schedule a consultation.

What to do if your spouse doesn’t want a divorce?

matrimonial attorney, expect the attorney to provide you with an overview of what to anticipate relative to at least the following five issues: (1) the divorce process, (2) matters pertaining to any minor children of the marriage, (3) division of your assets and liabilities, (4) support (both child

Why can't my lawyer say when things will happen?

Maybe your lawyer can't say when things will happen because too much depends on what the other side wants; still, she should have a general idea of how the case will proceed from your side given any number of scenarios. One matrimonial lawyer tells us that clients often seek her out for a second opinion on their case.

How long does it take for a lawyer to call you back?

If the court hands down any decisions regarding your case, your lawyer should notify you at once. Your attorney should return your calls within 24 hours unless there's some reason why that's impossible—for instance, if she's in court or in the middle of a trial.

How long does it take for a lawyer to respond to a letter?

Copies of letters should be sent to you within 24 hours of the lawyer's receipt. He or she should notify you about important phone calls—those concerning settlement proposals, for instance—as soon as possible.

What should an attorney tell you about a case?

Throughout your case, your attorney should give you some sense of whether the law supports your position. No attorney worth her weight will guarantee you a victory, but a knowledgeable lawyer should be able to tell you whether there is a basis for your position and what is likely to happen if the case is tried.

Do you need an expert to testify in custody?

Maybe custody will be an issue, and you'll need an expert to testify on your behalf. In some jurisdictions, the judge will appoint an expert to report to the court, but you still might need someone to support your case. Your lawyer should start getting you the names of qualified people.

Is law a science?

The practice of law is not a science, but it's not exactly an art either. There are certain things your attorney can and should be doing. For some guidelines, refer to the following list: Your lawyer should have an overall plan for your case.

Do matrimonial lawyers seek second opinions?

One matrimonial lawyer tells us that clients often seek her out for a second opinion on their case. The most frequent complaint: their case has no direction, they see no end in sight, and it seems like they're always responding to their spouse's action with no overriding plan of their own.

Why do you need to gather information?

Investments. You need all the information you can gather because at some point you and your wife will work through a property settlement agreement. Your attorney will approach this evidence gathering methodically, to preserve your rights and secure your financial future.

How long did it take for the Pony Express to cross the country?

The Pony Express was twice as fast as its nearest competitor, says The History Channel. Still, it took about 10 days for a document to cross the country from St. Joseph, Missouri to Sacramento, California. In a Virginia divorce, you will hardly feel the need to rush at the speed of ponies.

How long did the Pony Express exist?

The Pony Express only existed for 19 months. Its outsized stamp on our imaginations is due, probably, to the audacity of the idea — delivering important documents in a wholly original way that beat all other ways, like railroads, ship, stagecoaches, and freight wagons. Today we have even more methods for getting an important letter into someone’s hands. One of the least welcome methods is by service of process, delivered by (predictably) a process server. If you got a letter informing you that your wife has filed for divorce, you probably got it through a process server, who merrily walked away without a care in the world. Meanwhile, back at the ranch …

What happens when you go to court?

When you go to court, your lawyer will generally do most of the talking on your behalf. Unless the judge asks you a direct question, you probably won’t say much at all. However, your ex will be expected to speak for him- or herself.

Can my ex talk to my attorney?

Your ex cannot talk to your attorney for advice. Your lawyer and your ex can pass on information to each other, because your ex has no one to speak on his or her behalf, but that’s the legal extent of their communication with each other.

Is self representation necessary in divorce?

The Downside of Self-Representation During Divorce. While divorce seems like a straightforward process, that’s not always the case. In fact, there usually are back-and-forth documents that often need to be filed with the appropriate clerks within certain timeframes.

Can a friend give anecdotes about divorce?

Well-meaning friends and family might be able to provide personal anecdotes about their own child custody , property division and other divorce experiences, but every case has its own nuances; what works for one person won’t work for another, even if the situation is similar.

How to avoid divorce?

To try and avoid this result, keep your separate property in an individual account and/or keep all records of transactions involving your separate assets. Divorce can be a very complex subject, so consider consulting with a local divorce lawyer before proceeding. Talk to a Lawyer.

What happens if you don't get divorced?

The main factor in residency requirement laws is the period of time you've lived within the state where you plan to get divorced.

What are the factors that determine alimony?

Some common factors a court considers when awarding alimony are: 1 a spouse's actual need, and the other spouse's ability to pay 2 the length of the marriage 3 each spouse's age and health (both physical and emotional) 4 each spouse's earning capacity and level of education 5 parental responsibilities for the children 6 the division of marital property between the spouses, and 7 income available to either spouse through investment of that spouse's assets.

Why do divorces have no fault?

No-fault has become the avenue of choice in most divorces. There are various reasons for this. Because you don't have to prove your spouse did something wrong , there's typically less anxiety and tension during the divorce process. This is a big benefit, especially if there are children involved.

What is spousal support?

The object is to have the spouse become self-sufficient. Another type of short-term spousal support is "reimbursement" alimony, often awarded in short marriages where one spouse contributed to the other's pursuit of a college or graduate school degree.

How long can you get alimony?

The current trend is away from lifetime or permanent alimony, which is now typically reserved only for long-term marriages—generally considered to be anywhere from 10 to 20 or more years , depending on your state. In the current divorce environment, you're more apt to see a court award alimony for a limited duration.

What are the grounds for divorce?

Grounds for Divorce. Divorce "grounds" are the legal reasons on which you're basing your request that the court end your marriage. Grounds fall into two categories: fault-based and no-fault. Fault-based grounds are those that require you to prove that your spouse did something wrong, which caused the divorce.

What to do with a wife's petition for divorce?

Along with her Petition, your wife also likely filed Motions for Temporary Orders. Once a divorce action starts, there are issues that often cannot wait until the divorce is resolved. This includes matters regarding finances , child custody , child support, and spousal support. Your wife has, no doubt, carefully prepared these motions with her legal team. She may be asking the court to allow her to live in your house, give her full custody of your children, award her additional child support, order large spousal support, or grant her control over community assets.

What does it mean when your wife files for divorce?

If your wife filed first for divorce, it means she has been preparing to do it for a while and has a clear plan of what she wants to take with her from your marriage. While you may feel shell shocked, this is no time to surrender.

What is temporary order hearing?

A hearing on the Temporary Orders may be the only time during the divorce that a certain issue is argued. The terms of Temporary Orders often become permanent as part of the final Decree of dissolution of marriage issued by the court.

What happens if you file your wife first?

By filing first, your wife has started the clock and set the process on her time table. She was able to take as much time as she needed to prepare her Petition and choose when to file it with the court. You don’t have the same luxury of time. Along with her Petition, you were also served a Summons.

Is divorce emotionally difficult?

Divorce is emotionally challenging for all men. Unfortunately, some men experience so much guilt and despair about divorce that they give into every demand made by their wives or her attorney, no matter how ridiculous. If your wife filed first for divorce, it means she has been preparing to do it for a while and has a clear plan of what she wants to take with her from your marriage. While you may feel shell shocked, this is no time to surrender.

Is divorce decided by who files first?

Divorce cases are not decided by who files first. Still, the person who files first does gain a few advantages. It is important that you understand that by filing first, your wife has started a series of deadlines that you must meet. She has started out prepared with a plan. Now you need to play a little catch up.

What to do if your spouse doesn't want to divorce?

If your spouse doesn’t think divorcing is the right option for your family, he or she will likely ask you to change your mind about getting a divorce. In the case that you’re willing to go to counseling, be very specific about the purpose.

What is collaborative divorce?

Collaborative Divorce expands the possibilities for divorcing couples to reach peaceful settlements.

What to do if your spouse blames you?

If Your Spouse Blames You. Refuse to engage in the blame game. You can repeat what you have already said emphasizing four points: Your decision is irrevocable and you will not change your mind. You are determined to have a civilized and decent divorce in which everybody’s needs are addressed including your spouse’s.

How to save a marriage?

A spouse who wants to save a marriage will interpret everything you say and do in a way that supports a belief that there is hope for the marriage to remain intact. When those hopes are dashed, the whole process of angry lashing out will begin all over. Be careful about using pet names, sharing inside jokes, and acting as if everything is normal. ...

Why is it not safe to be nice to your spouse?

You may begin to feel that it is not safe for you to be nice to your spouse because it continues the cycle of hope and disappointment. As difficult as it might be, you might need to say, “I want to be able to be nice to you without causing you to think that we’re getting back together.”.

Is it hard to tell your spouse you want a divorce?

Telling your spouse you want a divorce is difficult. What comes after can be even more difficult. In my previous article, I talked about how to prepare for telling your spouse that you want a divorce. You know your spouse better than anyone, but if you’ve never had a discussion specifically about the reality that you will be divorcing, ...

Is settlement discussion productive?

Settlement discussions are not productive, and can actually be counter-productive, if they’re not done when you and your spouse have collected all the information you each need to make an informed decision and at a time when both of you have regained your emotional equilibrium.

How to choose a divorce attorney?

There are several things to look for when choosing a divorce attorney. You want to choose someone who is experienced, respected, competent, and affordable. If they are proving to not be a good fit though, change them. Because you can, even if the reason is that you don't get on with him or her. Bear in mind however that if an attorney has worked on your case, you'll have to pay her/him for their time. Also, it might damage your case to change attorney's when you are close to a court ordered deadline, so only do it after careful consideration.

What are some secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you?

Below are twenty secrets that a divorce lawyer may not want to share with you. 1. It's going to cost more than you bargained for. It's not always the case—but more often than not, the costs associated with your divorce will often be higher than your lawyer's original estimate.

How do divorce lawyers save money?

That you'll save money and heartache by being organized. Divorce lawyers often charge by the hour. If you take responsibility for being as organized as possible, not only are you likely to walk away from your marriage with a more acceptable outcome, you'll probably save some money too.

What is mediation in divorce?

Mediation is a process whereby you and your spouse sit down with a neutral third party to negotiate several important areas of divorce. It's a low-cost way to address practically any other disagreement you and your spouse may have. While the mediator's decision is not binding, it allows a neutral party to provide their perspective on how divorce related issues should be addressed. However, mediation can only be a useful tool if you and your spouse can come to an broad agreement.

What does it mean to be uncontested in divorce?

An uncontested divorce means that you and your spouse agree child custody, spousal support, child support, visitation, and division of property. If you find that there is no need to fight over these things, you've already saved yourself thousands of dollars.

What is fault based divorce?

Fault-based divorce is when one spouse committed an act that gives legal justification to the ending of the marriage. These acts include adultery, a felony conviction, cruelty, or desertion.

How to start a divorce?

One of the best and simplest ways to do that is to start a divorce file. In this file, keep every bit of paper that could have an effect on how your divorce proceedings. Gather copies of all important financial documents and access to all account information. Keep it organized and easy to navigate.